ARIES
You should not be surprised to be so particular and demanding this
month. But no worries, it won't last long. Soon you will only see the
sun and not the little clouds around it. If you go out, LKF will be
cracking with opportunities. Your 'take-it easy' attitude will
attract many souls, but you should be picky. On the 31st of May, Find a
TAURUS to meet your match.

TAURUS
Your surname is VIAGRA this month. Go and dispense your vitality all
around: everybody will find you attractive. But, in an overconfident
move, you might forget to shower and be clean. Actually you are full
of energy, but you stink of it. Yes, go shower right now after you
read this article, check if your teeth are not marked with salad
leftovers and please use deodorant for god’s sake. On the 28th of May,
find an ARIES to spend your energy with and who will spot the
Bolognese sauce stains on your brand new white shirt.

GEMINI
MALE GOD of SEX this month. If there is a god of sex, he would be
Gemini (this month). All flourish around you. Just don't overdo it;
otherwise your fragile health will remind you your mortal status.
And, that's true; this month will end in a whisper of nostalgia with
your approaching b-day that will add one more year to your “Gosh Am I
Balding Already?” personality. As for the Gemini chicks, their
Gemini brothers will finally find in them something irresistible.
GEMINI will fool around with GEMINI this month, so go find your other
horny-half.

CANCER
Yes you will get married one day and yes you will have babies one
day, so relax, don’t worry, and look around during this month. We
know you are not in the mood yet, but things are getting better,
right? Trust your future, but enjoy the present as well. Just one
more thing: change your haircut, and move your furniture. This change
will refresh your appeal and your sexual stamina. This month, you can
find a listening ear from an AQUARIUS.

LEO
FEMALE GOD of SEX this month. Bravo ma petite, bravissimo bella,
douch da boundio as we say in Brazil, France or Italy. You are
definitely the tip-top, must-have, shagg-a-delic chick of the month.
Smile at people like the cat that ate the mouse. All sins will be
forgiven in the name of the perfect pleasure that you will Endeavour.
Take your time, and all your charm is in your appearance, especially
the night of the 27th of May. If you meet a Gemini that night, alert
the police because the sex you have that night have the neighbors
complaining.

SAGITTARIUS
You always think you want to be free and alone, but sometimes it is
good to expulse your energy and stress thru sexual activity. Not that
you are passionate, but you find it playful expressive. So this
month, let your hormones rule and find a GEMINI before another GEMINI
steals your prey. You are going to be lucky with CAPRICORN if you
avoid thinking about the seduction, especially the 26th of May. Play
it cool.

VIRGO
Fragile Virgo, you are trying different positions this month.
Different does not mean bad; variety is the spice of life, no? This
month is good for flirting with random strangers. Pay attention to
the brief encounters of the day, because (he/she) might not be a
stranger for long. Sample a random SAGITTARIUS this month.

LIBRA
This month, you are sick of being the one who makes people at ease.
Now is your turn. Why should you be always the cool guy/girl/pet who
temper a situation? You have the right to have an extreme point of
view and make it accepted. So, speak your mind this month and be
aggressive! Seek out hot kisses in the darkness of the dance floor
like a lion/lioness on the hunt and when you make it to the bedroom
later, you decide who “rides” on top. A Gemini will attract you this
month but remember they prefer more ‘airborne’ positions.

SCORPIO
Come on. You know you are my favorite sign, so don't put the blame on
anyone this month. My little Scorpio needs A LOT of attention.
Otherwise, they feel that people are mean to them. No need to be
romantic because Scorpio you are a person of action, not words.
Any piece of advice for the Scorpio? Just be yourself. People will be fascinated by your appearance, go for black color, it adds mystery to your sex-appeal. Find a Capricorn to teach you this!

CAPRICORN
Time to choose. You have played enough, now you want some
commitment. And you are wrong. The more you will ask for
commitment, the
less chance you will have to get him/her/it. Go and force yourself
to enjoy new hidden pleasures.
Yeah, this month, you enjoy the forbidden fruit… Find a Scorpio to
walk on the dark side!

AQUARIUS
Not in the mood for fun, right? Well, then plan stuff for next month
or for vacation. Many things keep you busy and you just don't have
time to spend fooling around. This month, you have too many things
in mind, so just put everything on a paper. The list might be long but
once done you can rebound and have fun the way you like. Well, this month is about masturbation, if you have time…

PISCES
The roller coaster lover. One day up, one day down. One day your lover
finally understands you the way you like, another day you want to
erase
your lover's number on your mobile (how cruel!). You don't follow
advice, because you are lead by your feelings only.
So forget about today and find an old friend you use to date long ago.